


Good Hurts Bad Hurts

by tadok0ro



Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Baby's first ao3 post, Character Study, Friendship, Gen, General, Post-Game, Spoilers, slightly for end game and Solas romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-08
Updated: 2014-12-08
Packaged: 2018-02-28 17:05:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,061
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2740256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tadok0ro/pseuds/tadok0ro
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He was happy, but there was a lot of hurt left. She hurt the most, not the good hurts like the others.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Cole tries to offer help to a heart-broken Lavellan</p>
            </blockquote>





	Good Hurts Bad Hurts

Everyone is light. They hurt, but a good hurt, a hurt from everything that had happened, a hurt they wanted to remember, a hurt that made them happy now, like when the Iron Bull bites Dorian.

Cole feels light, too. He helped. Helped save everyone, helped save the world, helped heal all the hurts the Breach had caused. He was happy, but there was a lot of hurt left. She hurt the most, not the good hurts like the others.

She floats from friend to friend, sparse seconds spent with each, before finding her way to her quarters. He watches her, sees the smile she offers that seems to shatter her. He wants to help her.

\-----------

Alone in her room, she's trying not to cry.

"You're hurt," Cole says. He appears at the top of the stairs and she jumps in surprise.

"Cole!" Her voice catches in her throat, comes out strange. Anger. Inside her and showing on her face. He shrinks into himself, afraid, head bowed to hide her face, fingers fiddle with fraying clothing. She breathes, calms herself, not all that anger was for Cole. Her voice is softer, sweet, like it usually is, "Sorry, you startled me." He lifts his head, sees her running nose and sad, shining eyes. "Shouldn't you be down at the party? I heard Cullen finally demanded a rematch with Josie, wouldn't that be fun to watch?" She laughs, small, forced.

"But you're hurting."

She stills, shifts, stalls. "I thought I was too bright to get into my head..."

"You're still bright... just....It's like sunlight gleaming off a cracked mirror, shining in your eyes, hard to see, but stark, sunken lines of sadness...." He shifts his feet forward a few steps, loose shoelaces dragging across the stone. "It.... doesn't make sense....but I wouldn't have to look inside to know that you are hurt."  
A sad smile she offers. "We just saved the world, I should be happy-- overjoyed even!" Wavering, wobbly words. She sniffs, a single tear falls over empty, inkless skin.

"Once marked, now markless, but marked by him. He took away the marks and left his own."

"Cole..."

"He didn't want to hurt you."

She blinks, eyebrows twitch together, her fingers clench into fists and unclench again. "Well, he did." Voice sharp, striking, stinging like a dagger strike meant for someone else.

"Lips on yours, hot and hungry, always hungry for more that he wants, but won't take. Hands on you are strong yet gentle, comforting, calming...safe in his arms, safe, solace, Solas."

"Stop."

Cole focuses back on the reality around him, focuses on her face, scrunched up and streamed with tears. The hurts that had been dull and blunt are sharp and throbbing now, because of his words. He bowed his head, he didn't mean to hurt her more.

"Sorry," he offers, stepping closer to her. "I can make you forget...? If you want..."

"No... no, Cole, I don't want to forget, but thank you." Part of her wants to, she wants to forget and rid herself of the broken, empty feelings left behind. Rid of the hole in her chest like the hole once in the sky. She wipes the tears away, dampens the cuff of her nice clothes with snot and tears. "It's better to remember, even if it's painful." The small smile she offers is genuine.

"I still want to help... to make the hurt less."

She's quiet, contemplating, considering. "Can you..." she stops, bites her lip, looking away. "Can you feel him?"

"No." Cole sees her sag. "Your hurts are tied together, entangled, entwined... Pulled in two, two worlds whispering, splitting in two. He doesn't want to leave, but he cannot stay."

She steps closer to him, watching him with curious eyes. "Why did he leave then? If he wanted to stay, he could have... The Inquisition could have protected him. Why did he leave me?!” Cole sees her own words wounding her.

"He could not stay."

"Why?"

"I.... don't know...." She's disappointed, distressed still. He has let her down. He bows his head. "Sorry..."

She huffs a small laugh, places a hand on his shoulder. "It's ok, Cole. I should be the one apologizing. I didn't mean to take any of my frustration out on you."

"You're hurt. People often say things they don't mean when they're hurting. That's why I want to help."

She suddenly hugs him; arms wrapped tight and warm around him, clinging as if a current would wash her away. She is bright and warm, shining like the sun on a snowy day, smelling as sweet as the spring's flowers. "I'm just confused... and frustrated, and hurt," Mouth muffled by clothing, she's crying again. Slowly Cole returns the embrace. He's seen the gesture before but never done it, he doesn't usually like being touched, but it will help her heal. "I'm mad as hell at him too," a laugh bursts from her chest. "More mad than anything right now! If I saw him right now I'd probably try to stick him with arrows." She giggles, buries her face into Cole's chest. "And have a few choice words for him... although I don't think it would be good for our image to have the Inquisitor screaming blasphemous things across Skyhold." She's silent, turns her head and sighs. She feels lighter now. Her words a quiet, almost a whisper when she speaks, "I miss him though."

"I miss him, too. He was my friend. Losing friends is always sad." Like Rhys and Evangeline. But this time he has other friends, more friends, friends that didn't leave him when they found out what he was. "Having other friends helps. When you're in the dark, dank, depths of yourself, alone and scared, feeling lost, they drag you out and draw you back. Like when you helped me."

She falls silent. He feels the dampness seeping through his shirt where her tears gather. They stay like that for several long moments, silent save for her quiet sniffs. He feels her wound begin to mend, like the beginnings of a scab to stop the bleeding.

Eventually she lets go, leans back away from Cole and looks up at him with a smile. "That helped. Thank you."

He pats her awkwardly, another thing he's seen people do. He's glad he helped and smiles back. "Ok. Good."

**Author's Note:**

> First time writing in a very long time, even longer since I've dared sharing something with others. I hope I did Cole justice and I hope there aren't too many errors.


End file.
